A candle was lit by Alice Murray
on January 16, 2018 8:18 PM
What does one say when a precious and loving heart and spirit like our beloved Colleen leaves this earth without warning; a young woman who had dreams, goals, promise, and hope? What does one say when hearts are crushed and overflowing with emotions; leaving loved ones numb, sorrowed, grieved beyond expression; lifeless? How does one go on without their beloved Colleen? What does one say to the family whose hearts are so close that only one heartbeat can be felt? What does one say to the mother who carried her and nurtured her and loved her and the father who provided for her and protected her; and her siblings who grew up together; who laughed with her and cried with her and supported her; a family who share life together, who love and respect each other; who are always there for one another? What does one say when a family faces the reality that their darling Colleen is gone; the air they breathe, the beat of their heart; the light in their life? There are no consoling words. Who can hear anything but the resonating sound of her absence?
All I can say is what is in my heart to say. I will try not to be burdensome in my writing. Colleen was beyond loved. Her innocence; her kindness and concern for others; her genuine heart; her heartwarming smile; her laughter; and her honesty were many of the qualities that I will remember forever. Her heart had found its way into the hearts of so many. She was that person. She was loved by everyone who came to know her.
I will always treasure the time I had with her. She played volleyball for me and what a pleasure it was to coach her and watch her grow as a player and young woman. I can say that on behalf of the entire coaching staff, coaches Anello, Hatfield (rest in peace), and Bitter. Not to forget coach Smitty who loved the Stamper girls. Oh, could she make us laugh! We shared something in common and that was gullibility. Someone could tell her something (in a playful manner) that wasn’t true and she would believe it and her reaction was always a sight to witness. Then, when she discovered that someone was pulling her leg, her expression and reaction was priceless. She was a good sport about it. That was a part of her innocence and what made her who she was. When she broke her ankle she sat on the bench, but she never felt sorry for herself. She encouraged and motivated every player both on and off the court. She became very insightful and her mental game increased so much that I referred to her as my other assistant coach. I watched her play softball and what a ball player she was. Smitty would often share wonderful and often times very funny stories about his players and she was no exception. Everything she did she put forth her best effort. Her presence was felt and received with love and joy. She was always respectful in every situation. She honored her parents; a quality that is fading today. She was respectful to adults and peers. She took criticism with maturity, dignity and grace; another quality that is rare in this day and age. She was a good listener and friend to many. There isn’t a person I know that knew Colleen that didn’t have wonderful things to say about her. She was truly loved. We will be remembering her for years to come. We will share stories about her with tears and joy because we love her and miss her. But, they will be only pleasant memories of her that will make our hearts smile and laugh. What a beautiful soul our darling Colleen was.
Colleen and I had many talks during her time at Woodward. She would ask for advice at times or she just needed someone to talk to that would listen. We talked about many things including school, sports, goals, the future, family, relationships, life and God. Colleen and I had a few serious conversations about the Lord. She shared her thoughts and feelings and she expressed her desire to have a deeper understanding of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. She said she believed John 3:16. She wanted to strengthen her faith and her relationship with the Lord. I saw it in her eyes and I felt it from her heart. That is what I hold onto now. Through the anguish, tears and gut-wrenching pain; that is what I will hold onto. God’s promise is true. She is a child of God and so I know where she is for a certainty; and one day we will be reconciled with one another in the presence of our Lord forever. No more sorrow, pain or tears. I know this provides little comfort now. We want her here. We don’t want to feel the devastating emotions now. Who would ever want to? God is merciful. Turn to Him. Look to Him always for strength and comfort. Be tender with one another. You are going to need each other now more than ever.
I just want to wrap my arms around her and tell her I love her and to thank her for all the joy she brought to my life. She was a blessing to me. I will miss her deeply. And to the family, I pray you feel the loving arms of the Lord around you. He understands all that you suffer. He is no stranger to suffering. He knows all things even when we don’t. Trust in Him that created us. He loves His children. He loves Colleen. His love is greater than we could ever comprehend.
I know there has been an outpour of love and support from near and far. You are surrounded by love. May the Lord sustain you, strengthen you, and comfort you always.
With love,
Alice Murray
Psalm 23
A Psalm of David
The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
John 10: 27-28
My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father's hand.
John 14: 2-3
Let not your heart be troubled: ye believe in God, believe also in me.
In my Father's house are many mansions: if it were not so, I would have told you. I go to prepare a place for you.
And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again, and receive you unto myself; that where I am, there ye may be also.
God’s Promise
God never promised a life without pain,
Laughter without tears or sun without rain,
But He did promise strength for the day,
Comfort for the tears and the light for the way,
And for all who believe in His Heaven above
He rewards their faith in His everlasting love.
When Tomorrow Starts Without Me
When tomorrow starts without me,
And I am not there to see,
If the sun should rise and find your eyes
All filled with tears for me;
I wish so much you wouldn't cry
The way you did today,
While thinking of the many things,
We didn't get to say.
I know how much you love me,
As much as I love you,
And each time that you think of me,
I know you will miss me too;
But when tomorrow starts without me,
Please try to understand,
That an angel came and called my name,
And took me by the hand,
And said my place was ready,
In heaven far above,
And that I'd have to leave behind
All those I dearly love.
But as I turned to walk away,
A tear fell from my eye
For all my life, I'd always thought,
I didn't want to die.
I had so much to live for,
So much left yet to do,
It almost seemed impossible
That I was leaving you.
I thought of all the yesterdays,
The good ones and the bad,
I thought of all the love we shared,
And all the fun we had.
If I could relive yesterday,
Just even for a while,
I'd say good-bye and kiss you
And maybe see you smile.
But then I fully realized,
That this could never be,
For emptiness and memories,
Would take the place of me.
And when I thought of worldly things,
I might miss come tomorrow,
I thought of you, and when I did,
My heart was filled with sorrow.
But when I walked through heaven's gates,
I felt so much at home.
When God looked down and smiled at me,
From His great golden throne,
He said, "This is eternity,
And all I have promised you.
Today your life on earth is past,
But here life starts anew.
I promise no tomorrow,
But today will always last,
And since each day's the same way
There's no longing for the past.
You have been so faithful,
So trusting and so true.
Though there were times you did some things.
You knew you shouldn't do.
But you have been forgiven
And now at last you're free.
So won't you come and take my hand
And share my life with me?"
So when tomorrow starts without me,
Don't think we're far apart,
For every time you think of me,
I'm right here, in your heart
Remember Me
Remember me when you hear the wind blow.
I am with God, I need you to know.
He called my name, and I went to see
If the voice I heard was speaking to me.
He took my hand, we walked along
The road to heaven, where I belong.
The angles sang so sweet and clear.
They sang of love and that Jesus is near.
I felt his touch, I saw his face,
I knew in an instant I was in his grace.
He spoke to me, I heard him say,
You are home now child, you have found your way.
So remember me when you hear the wind blow.
I am home now with God, I need you to know.
I’m Free
Don't grieve for me, for now I'm free,
I'm following the path God laid for me.
I took his hand when I heard his call,
I turned my back and left it all.
I could not stay another day,
To laugh, to love, to work, to play.
Tasks left undone must stay that way,
I've found that peace at the close of the day.
If my parting has left a void,
Then fill it with remembered joy.
A friendship shared, a laugh, a kiss,
Ah yes, these things I too will miss.
Be not burdened with times of sorrow,
I wish you the sunshine of tomorrow.
My Life's been full, I savoured much,
Good friends, good times, a loved one's touch,
Perhaps my time seemed all too brief,
Don't lengthen it now with undue grief.
Lift up your heart and share with me,
God wanted me now, He set me free.